Hey there everybody! So I watched a video by AmazingPhil a few weeks back talking about how 2017 was trying to kill him and I remember thinking to myself, “Oh, well that’s not a great way to start out the year, glad that isn’t me!”
Yeah, things have taken a turn.
This story starts back in mid-January. Now the steps in our apartment are hardwood and I’ve known for some time that I was going to slip and fall one day. My socks are just too slippery. This one fine evening I was heading downstairs with my laptop in hand to go make myself some mac ‘n cheese with a side of Netflix when the inevitable hit; I took a good old-fashioned tumble.
I didn’t just slip and slide. No, my feet literally came out from underneath me and I landed on my lower back on that wonderful hardwood. Thankfully I was only a few steps from the bottom and my grip on my laptop held true so it could’ve been worse!
I wish I had a picture of the bruise I got from this because man, was it impressive! I had to spend a few minutes writhing on the floor before I could get up to make my mac ‘n cheese.
So a week goes by and my bruise heals to the point that I can start wearing pants with a belt again and not be in severe pain. That’s when our next calamity strikes.
Before I get into this one, I’ll admit that I had some hormones doing their thing at the time which clouded my judgment just a little bit.
I have this cheap storage unit thing that lives in my closet. I keep all my extra bags in one of the cheap draws of the cheap storage unit. The bag I needed was at the bottom of the drawer, so I decided to just take the drawer out instead of taking all the bags out. Efficiency, right?
This was mistake number one.
When I went to put the drawer back in, for some reason it wouldn’t budge. I could get one side to go in, but the other wasn’t having it. I was pissed. Really pissed.
After some shoving and swearing I finally got the drawer back in place, but somehow the front panel popped off on one side. This only added fuel to the hormonal fire that was brewing. When I couldn’t get the panel to stick back down, I decided to just pull the drawer out entirely and see what I could do.
This was mistake number two.
So here I am, one hand on the drawer pull of the front panel and the other holding the actual side of the drawer that I could now see with the panel hanging off. I was trying to gently ease it out, but apparently, I wasn’t gentle enough because the other side of the panel decided to give way and whap me square in the face.
I Mcfreaking lost it.
At first, I was only concerned about my mouth and whether my teeth were loose. Spoiler alert: my teeth were fine and dandy. I think the bottom edge of the panel made impact right below my nose because I had a nice little cut there when I went to look in the mirror.
After angry crying and throwing the panel somewhere in my room, I got some ice and took a sit on the couch to cool off. That’s when I realized the pain was moving north into my nose and I began to wonder if my nose was broken.
This thought was only enforced when I went to go blow my nose after all the angry crying and found out nose blowing was a complete no-go from pain. Despite my mom’s suggestions to go get an x-ray, I stuck to the knowledge I had gotten from Google and diagnosed myself with just some non-doctor worthy swelling and bruising. (Fun fact: my roommate only just told me yesterday that while I was fuming on the couch, she called our nursing major friend to ask her if she thought I needed to go to the emergency room. She came to the same conclusion as I did)
Now fast forward to last night. It’s been about three weeks since the drawer incident and I was down to just a little bit of pain in the end of my nose if I bumped it or something. While at a game night with some friends, I leaned forward while laughing right as one of my friends walked past me.
Boom, nose meets shoulder and they do not hit it off. I think it hurt a lot more than it normally would thanks to the soreness still there from round one, but dang, not fun. I heard a crunch and for a second, I was scared that I had actually done it this time.
Thankfully, I’m not in nearly as much pain this time around so it’s all good. At this rate, I’m expecting my next calamity to hit within mid-March.
This one was a long one, so I really appreciate you sticking with me if you made it to the end! 2017 isn’t exactly trying to kill me, but it also hasn’t been too kind to me, either. It could be worse! If I have any more ridiculous injuries, I’ll be sure to update this story. Until then, that’s all I’ve got for you. I’ll see you when I see you and I hope you have a nice day!